Monday, April 6, 2009

Brat

I'm pretty sure if you went to the dictionary to look up the word brat that this is the picture you'd see next to it.
I'm pretty sure that my husband would agree with you. And I'm almost positive that the big Man Upstairs would be on board with this label as well.

I've not been a great wife, mother,daughter, sister or friend this last little while. I haven't done my jobs. I've sat in front of the tv and the computer, stuffed my face and felt sorry for myself.

Why you ask? That's the sad part. I really have no reason. None, nada, zip. I have just been in a serious funk. I have some things that have happened that I'm sure I could use as excuses. But that's just what they would be...excuses.

I hate feeling this way. H.A.T.E it. But it seems that each time I fall into one of these funks it gets harder and harder to get back out. I hear voices in my head (okay not actual voices but you know what I mean) that say some pretty horrible things to me and about me. And I actually believe them. And then I get the feeling that other people are thinking those same things in their heads about me.

My husband has been pretty understanding and hasn't said anything but I get the feeling he's reaching the end of his patience.

I do try to put on a good face but it's getting pretty hard. The talks that were given during General Conference were a boost. A kick in the butt if you will. Hopefully I can pull my head out and get a move on. Wish me luck.

I don't like being a brat.

29 comments:

Shauna said...

You are a sweetheart and special! No brat in my eyes :) L♥ve and Hugs to you my precious friend!!!

Kristina P. said...

Shanna, I get like this too sometimes. In fact, my husband called me after he left work yesterday, and for some reason, I was a snot to him. For no reason! Fortunately, he loves me and puts up with me too. And it helps that I'm not normally like that.

Christa said...

I'm sorry to tell you this, but I have the brat market cornered. I'm the queen of them all.

Unfortunately, I know exactly what you mean by a funk and the voices in your head. I get the same ones talking to me sometimes. It's hard to make them go away. Conference gave me a good, swift kick in the butt too. Hopefully, we'll all be able to pull ourselves out of our respective funks.

Bobie said...

You're awesome. But that little voice in your head!! Chin up, there is much to be thankful for!!

Lara said...

Good luck! I always love conference for that reason. Especially in April. Because I am basically a brat all winter. Just can't handle it.

Melissa said...

Tell the voices to SHUT UP! Funks blow - but hang in there...... it'll pass! : )

Fiauna said...

(((hugs))). I hope you feel better soon. You don't deserve to feel so down. Don't lose your smile. : )

Martha H. said...

I'm right there with you, sistah! I've been hearing from so many people lately that they are all in a bit of a funk, too. Don't know what's really up, but I wish it would just go away.

I think you're fabulous!

That Girl in Brazil said...

Sometimes those funks are really DEPRESSION, beb.

(Been there, done that.)

Ya sure this is more than just a funk?

And for the record, you're the cutest brat I'VE ever seen.

I wish I could give you chocolate. And watch a chick flick. And maybe some ice cream too. Wanna come over?

Mina said...

I've had that same trouble. I'm not sure how to get over it. Good luck, and let me know when you find the answer!

The Wixom Zoo said...

I think this time of year is hard for most of us. Spring is coming though - I have to keep believing that...

Karen said...

You sound like you have some serious and very real depression. Have you seen someone about it? There are some very good medications out there that can help. My 28 year old son went on medication 2 years ago and he feels so much better. He's happy and relieved that he did it instead of just trying to struggle through it.

Lady of Perpetual Chaos said...

I must admit that I have a hard time believing that you could be a brat. But good luck anyway! Go buy yourself some flowers....they always make me feel better. How can you be bratty looking at fresh flowers?! Or....get your husband to do it. Even Better!!!

Me said...

You can do this! You can bring yourself out of this funk! I find I have my own funk, and it usually peaks at the end of winter..heading into Spring. Besides, knowing that you need to change and being willing to change it is half the battle!

Vanessa said...

I hear ya! I have sort of been in one lately too. Maybe it is the indecisiveness of the weather. Just know, you can always complain to your blogging peeps and we are here to listen :)

Erin said...

Ugh. We all feel this way sometimes, don't we? Do you go check your e-mail every 10 minutes all day? Hoping there is something new? I do that sometimes. I hope things start looking up for you soon!

Neurotic Chic said...

Aw, I love ya. Just remember: emotional rollercoasters go up after they swing down. You're due for a big "up", girlie.

♫ Spasm ♫ said...

well, we weren't planning on a UT trip this year but now I jsut might have to fly out there and kick those voices. They are not telling you the truth. If anything they are working for you know who and if they win, then the many lives you touch would be in jeopardy... so please, kick them out!!! or I'll be forced to fly in and if I ever did come in, and his family found out? I would be in trouble!

♫ Spasm ♫ said...

and.... you are beautiful and amazing... temple trip might help too? love you!!!!

Nick and Emily said...

DUDE! i completely understand what you mean. it gets so hard to get out of the funk and you just sink deeper and deeper. and i hear those voices too. it's so easy to believe that other people are really thinking those bad things but i promise they're not. if they were they wouldn't be your friend to begin with.

i think you're ubber duper wonderful.

Jo said...

You are not a brat, you are feeling down and blue. I will come over and beat up those voices in your head for being soooo mean to you! You need them to tell you what a great mom you are, what a good wife you are, what a kind friend you are, that you are funny, talented, sweet, giving and every other nice word. Geez, some voices, tell them to be quiet.

Shawn said...

Wow! It must be in the air! I have had so many tantrum feelings in this past week or so, and I just don't feel like doing ANYTHING!!

But, as the seasons, I am sure that it will pass, just as yours will---I am new to your site, but you seem like an amazing person with a great family! And I have to say that you have the most gorgeous eyes that I have ever seen!!!

Seriously---you rock!

Wendyburd1 said...

You are not a brat! When you get in the dumps, and I am a Queen of Dumpsland, and those voices come, and boy do I know them so well and they know they get me everytime, you can't just go, snap out of it! It takes time, and lots for some of us, I wish I was the 24 hour dumpland dweller!!

Kate said...

I hate it when I feel that way. You need to do something for you. It always is hard for me but I go for a walk or a bike ride. Exercise always seems to help or just go out and spoil yourself. I am sorry. I hope you get feeling better soon. Have a great week and smile.

Bonnie the Boss said...

I get feeling that way to at times! Hopfully the sunshine will help too! Hang in there!

tiburon said...

I hope you can snap out of it soon! I think we all have those days (or weeks!)

The Ginskeys said...

Hey, been there, done that. I think everyone gets in those little "funks" once in awhile.
I have not met you, but I want to tell you how much I appreciate your comments on my blog. You are awesome! it makes my day knowing someone is reading my blog.

Becca said...

I so totally know how you feel. I know so many people (myself included) who are feeling that way right now...must be the weather...at least I hope it is.
Good luck snapping out of it, and if you figure out how to do it, by all means, share!

susette said...

Is there something in the water? I'm so tired of these feelings but don't know how to make them go away!