Monday, October 31, 2016

To the Man in Ohio Who Told My Son "Go Kill Yourself"


My son works for a market research company. That means he called you yesterday to ask you to take survey, nothing more. He was only doing his job. I realize that you don't want to be bothered. I get that really I do, especially on a Sunday afternoon. You made that clear by telling my son that he shouldn't be calling on a Sunday because it was a sacred day. My son apologized and you then proceeded to berate him by telling him he was worthless, and that his job is stupid, all punctuated by lovely profane and very un-sacred words. To top it all off you told him "Go kill yourself."

My son was already feeling bad because the call he that he had just finished was a lady that thought my son was her brother calling. Their mom had just died. She started talking to him like he was her brother and she broke down crying telling him "Mom's dead." My son apologized and had to explain that he wasn't who she thought it was. He told her that what he was calling about was irrelevant and apologized again, he felt horrible. He knows what it is to lose people he loves.

Then he got connected to you.

Let me tell you about my son. He is working at this job so he can earn money to be able to go on a trip to Europe at the end of his Senior year in high school with his AP art class. He loves art and has a talent for drawing. He loves camping and hiking and air soft. After graduation he wants to go to college and work in outdoor recreation. He is funny and bright. He has a tender heart that cares and feels things very deeply.

He also struggles with depression. He has had thoughts of suicide and has made at least one attempt. We have been working hard with him to get him to a place where these feelings are manageable. He ended up having to leave work early yesterday because of the things that you said to him. His supervisors were on the line and heard what was said. They told him that yours was the most brutal call that they have heard come through.

When my oldest son (who has autism) heard what had happened he was very angry and wanted justice. We tried to explain to him that really, there was no way that justice could be served. He was so angry.

I am I angry? Yes.
Am I sad? Yes.
Is there anything I can do about what happened?
No, not really.

I have to tell myself that maybe you were just having a bad day. You are obviously a very angry man and it's very possible there are bad things that have happened to you in your life that have made you this way. Maybe the only way that you can feel good about yourself is to tear down a 17 year old kid who randomly called your house and tell him he should take his own life.

I feel sorry for you. Your life cannot be a happy one.

I hope and pray that you can find some peace. That maybe one day you will be in a place where you don't need to belittle others. That if another call comes through on a Sunday that you can ignore it or just hang up instead of trying to bring others down into the vile darkness where you now reside.

As for me and my son? I will continue to let him know that he is needed here on this earth. No one else can take his place. That he is loved and incredible and important. As we all are.

Even you.


A Mom