Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Motherhood Challenge: The Big Question

-Day 2-


“BIOLOGY IS THE LEAST OF WHAT
MAKES SOMEONE A MOTHER.”
-OPRAH WINFREY

Do you know what is fabulous?

You are!

We all are!

So HERE is the question....

Why, then would such
loving,
caring,
beautiful,
amazing,
Fabulous women
want to tear one another down?

Why?

This has always been mystery to me. Why, as women, do we tend to pick one another apart? Does it make us feel better? Does it make us feel superior? Does it help us lose weight?

The answer to all the above is no. So why?

I have a beautiful mother who taught me a wonderful lesson growing up. And it wasn't a "Sit down and have a conversation about this" type of lesson. It was something that she taught me through her actions.

I remember distinctly being with my mother as she was around other women discussing life and the universe, you know like all moms do. Sometimes she was on our telephone, ( the one that had the twenty foot cord so it could stretch to the sink or around the corner so she could keep doing house work while she talked.) Sometimes it was in little groups of women. Sometimes it was sitting in our back yard with the women of the family snipping beans or eating ice cream.

It didn't matter where it was though because more than once I heard the phrase "Shut my mouth!" escape from my mother's lips. She would then go onto apologize for whatever it was she had been going to say or that she had actually said because she knew it wasn't right to say bad things about others.

What really impressed me was that often times, I felt, that she had a good reason....or even a right to say bad things about these people (and these people were usually of the female persuasion) because I knew the things that they had done or said to her. But she would always stop herself, do an about face and either move onto another subject or find something nice to say about whoever she was talking about.

That lesson has stuck to me like glue. Have I lived it? Not all the time but I do try. (There are still people that I truly, truly struggle with because of the hurt they have caused and continue to cause but I am working on keeping my mouth shut.)

I wish we could see each other through the windows love and acceptance.

I wish that you all could see yourselves the way I see you because I see incredible women every where I go, every single day.

You all influence me. You have all "mothered" me in some way or another. Whether in a phone call, a hug or a smile, and even the random comment in the supermarket isle from a stranger letting me know "Hey, we've all been there."

(Tangent...when was the last time you used the word supermarket?? That seems weird.
Now back to our regularly scheduled post.)

Guess what??

It doesn't matter to me if you work or if you stay at home.
It doesn't matter if you are single or married.
It doesn't matter to me if you have children or not.

Do you know what matters to me?

You do.

YOU matter to me.

Now go...

Be Fabulous.

7 comments:

Jay Gifford said...

One day it will be nice to see each other through Heavenly Father's eyes. I wonder how we would treat each other if we saw what Heavenly Father sees? No one can see the pains, the struggles, the trials that each other is going through. All judgements made, are made based only on the surface of another. Thank you for this post. Even though I am a 'guy' and this is directed to women, I wholeheartedly agree with it.

Funky Kim said...

I love this and I love you!

M said...

I know that I am going to LOVE this week's posts from you - not that I don't always like your posts, but because I have a feeling they are going to be just what I need to hear.

Now go, be fabulous (love it!)

Barbaloot said...

What a beautiful post. Thank you!

wendy said...

Ten Day Challenge celebrating Motherhood.
I will look forward to all you have to share on this.
Both the posts were really really good. You are so right, we judge judge judge...who's the thinnest. who's the cutest, who's got the nicest cloths, whose house is cleanest and has the nicest decorations, and who's kids are the most accomplished
Sheeeesh, wears me out.
So I loved what you had to say on the matter.

I am not sure if I can do Fabulous right now, I still find mediocre rather challenging.

Jessica G. said...

I really needed this reminder...we're having a terrible problem with gossiping in our ward (especially where releases and callings are concerned) and I am going to start using your mother's phrase. I definitely need to shut my mouth.

Cynthia said...

I should have read this post before commenting on the Day 3 post. I also aspire to be more like your Mother. I TRY not to gossip but that's easier said than done where a couple of people are concerned (and totally easy to avoid with some others).